Cherish the ones that thank you for returning their call.
Acknowledge those that wave a hand in gratitude for letting them cut in line in traffic.
I know how honorable of a gesture that is, in Los Angeles especially.
Normalize genuinely complimenting friends of all genders without feeling so line-crossing.
Be at peace with failed relationships.
Some bonds were never meant for that level of long term intimacy.
Men that had absolutely shattered my heart are now considerably on a friendly, acquaintance level.
I hold value in loving those situations back into where it was when it was “just friends.”
It is more rare of an occurrence if I were to hold a grudge.
It took many years to release the power that emotions held over my mental state.
I cried, I wept, and I would speak with such verbal frustration because the triggers of my PTSD felt unmanageable.
I blamed my uncontrollable traumas for any negativity.
I would shut down in moments where my mind felt lost.
I did not expect anyone to understand.
At this point, I am sounding like a broken record.
Until one night, without any regards of the emotional weight, I spoke everything aloud.
Yes, everything.
Hearing, “You are right, I do not understand but I want to make it feel a little less heavy on your own,” felt insuring.
Since that night, my emotions have never been carried the same.
Any further of an explanation may result in a cure for universal sadness.
Before any further cringing at how pompous that might sound,
Set both bare feet on the ground...
And repeat these affirmations aloud twice a day:
“I am actively committing to a pursuit of happiness.”
“I willing accept the emotional and mental relief I deserve”
“Any of my patterns that no longer serve me positive outcomes are being broken.”
Now, let’s talk about how we feel.
-t