Here’s the start of an apology that I wish I had received.
Every time I was heartbroken, I felt a piece of me bleed.
Every time I was disappointed, I felt like I was hit in the chest with a bat.
This time around, I did not expect to be on the other side of that.
I do not do well with hurt feelings.
I manage, but that is the gist.
Just know, that you are already missed.
This one is going to sting for a while.
I am sorry if you felt like your love was put on trial.
I love you more than I ever imagined.
I will carry you in my heart, if not a lifetime, then for a while.
Have you ever heard me make I promise that I would not keep?
You probably think, “it is really not that deep.”
I am sorry in advance.
You have mended my heart and made me feel in a trance.
I mourn for the day that I am no longer put in first place.
It is my own heart that I still need to chase.
I’m hurting over a decision that should not feel this way, but I hope you would want me to make my own way.
My feelings towards you do not matter in the grand scheme, it is my own trauma that ruins every dream.
My wish is to have you in my heart for an eternity, but I understand if for a while you want to ghost me.
I miss us already, your love was steady.
I hate how I am feeling inside, but just know you have helped me a great stride.
You love my cat like no one ever has, that in itself makes it even tougher to let go.
Every time I am by the ocean, I know I will think of you more.
I hate to hurt or disappoint you, but hopefully you can understand what I am going through.
I loved you then, I will love you forever.
I hope our bond makes it through this weather.
-t
